Hollywood’s Hottest Jewish Leading Ladies

30 Nov 2013


1

45. Barbra Streisand


OK, so Babs might not be the ~hottest~, but she is like, queen of the Torah, SO SHE’S ON THIS LIST. Plus, she’s still got it.

2

44. Sarah Michelle Gellar


She married Freddie Prinze Jr. and had his babies. She obviously has something going on.

3

43. Goldie Hawn


She’s a hot mom! A hot Jewish mom. A J-MILF.

4

42. Alicia Silverstone


Honestly, she’d be higher up on this list if she hadn’t bird-fed her son. That was not hawt.

5

41. Lisa Kudrow


Smelly cat, smelly cat, what are they feeding you? OH! It’s bagels! THAT’S AWESOME.

6

40. Julia Louis-Dreyfus


She’s funny, she’s the veep, and she’s No. 40 on this list.

7

39. Jennifer Connelly


Congrats to Jennifer Connely on being in the top 70% of this post!

8

38. Selma Blair


Same goes for Selma Blair. And also she’d be higher on this list if she hadn’t accused Elle Woods of sleeping with her law professor.

9

37. Amanda Peet


Amanda Peet rhymes with Amanda Feet and I bet her feet are nice because they were chosen.

10

36. Brooke Burke


Brooke Burke is on this list because she just is, OK?

11

35. Dianna Agron


Yes it’s weird that there are two “Ns” in Dianna’s name, but you know what’s NOT weird? The fact that she’s on this list! Ha HA Ha.

12

34. Ginnifer Goodwin


Ginnifer Goodwin got No. 34, OK? And that’s where she stays.

13

33. Evan Rachel Wood


Hi, Evan Rachel Wood, nice to see you here in spot No. 33.

14

32. Jamie-Lynn Sigler


Things are heating up!!

15

31. Maya Rudolph


The Shabbat candles are on fire if you know what I meannnnnn! (What do I mean?)

16

30. Michelle Trachtenberg


Harriet The Spy lands in at No. 30. CONGRATS TO HER. Seriously. I’m serious, let’s all raise a glass and say congrats. Now sip.

17

29. Kate Hudson


She is the spawn of the J-MILF up there, and obviously the beautiful Jewish genes were passed along to her.

18

28. Idina Menzel


Popular, she’s gonna be popularrrrrrrr (with everyone she talks to because they know she is cool/fun/pretty/responsible for your love of Broadway).

19

27. Elizabeth Banks


“THAT IS MAHOGANY,” she said as she placed the seder plate onto the table.

20

26. Alyson Hannigan


How I Met Your Mother, try How Your Mother and I Met Through Your Grandma’s Rabbi.

21

25. Sara Paxton


Ladies and gentlemen, meet Sara Paxton. She seems like a nice young lady to bring home for Passover.

22

24. Natasha Lyonne


Orange Is the New Black more like Thanksgivukkah Is the New Hanukkah because that holiday is tomorrow, yeah BOIII!!!!!

23

23. Rachel Weisz


More like Rachel Weisz-she so pretty???!!! Amirite.

24

22. Gwyneth Paltrow


GOOP is high on this list because she’s Gwyneth Paltrow but couldn’t break the top 20 because she nicknamed herself GOOP.

25

21. Sarah Silverman


Baruch Hashem for Sarah Silverman. BARUCH HASHEM, I SAID.

26

20. Emmy Rossum


This is now the top 20. This is when people stop being polite and start getting real. Welcome, Emmy Rossum. Please, take a seat.

27

19. Kat Graham


This is the first Kat on the list, but not the last, I promise you that!

28

18. Kat Dennings


I wasn’t lying when I said there was another Kat on this list. This is that Kat.

29

17. Zoe Kravitz


Picture this: Zoe Kravitz and her dad Lenny Kravitz reading from the Torah. IT COULD HAPPEN!

30

16. Jane Levy


A rare but beautiful Jewish ginger seen here.

31

15. Lea Michele


Shalom. Lea got this spot not just because she’s a classy lady, but because my Hebrew name is Lea so obviously I have a special place in my heart for her.

32

14. Mélanie Laurent


Not only is Mélanie gorgeous but she’s French. Which means she probably loves French fries, and French fries are potatoes, and potatoes are the main ingredient in Latkes, and LATKES ARE THE BEST HANUKKAH TREAT IN THE WORLD. It all makes sense.

33

13. Isla Fisher


She converted to Judaism, but it counts because that’s how much she wanted to be Jewish, and we welcome her with open arms.

34

12. Ari Graynor


For a good time call…your rabbi! (Because she’s Jewish and he may know her!)

35

11. Emmanuelle Chriqui


Oh, look, it’s E’s girlfriend.

36

10. Nikki Reed


WELCOME TO THE TOP 10! Shit’s about to get serious.

37

9. Gal Gadot


I told you it was getting serious. And I was serious when I said it was getting serious.

38

8. Lizzy Caplan


LIZZY CAPLAN, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!!!

39

7. Bar Refaeli


She’s Israeli, she is basically the definition of perfection, and her name is BAR, which basically means she’s probably a lot of fun because bars are cool places to go to and hang out with friends.

40

6. Scarlett Johansson


More like Scarlett Johandsome. But, like, the female version of handsome.

41

5. Natalie Portman


Aleph-bets are off when Natalie Portman enters the room! (LOLOLOLOLOLOL)

42

4. Rosie Huntington-Whiteley


MUST I EXPLAIN?

43

3. Rashida Jones


Rashida Jones is the best friend I wish I had but would never want to be around because she’s almost TOO wonderful that her wonderfulness could be overwhelming. But she’s No. 3 because I mean, come on, look at her.

44

2. Alison Brie


She may have chosen Community college but we know she would have been the coolest girl at Yeshiva. —joke contribution from my nice Jewish brother Eric

45

1. Mila Kunis


WE’VE ARRIVED AT THE NO. 1 SPOT. You know why. Everyone knows why. Your dog knows why. Word has it 1,900 priests renounced Christianity and converted when they heard she was Jewish. Congratulations to Mila and to everyone else.


17   Comments ?
1
1.
gigantes 7 year s ago
hum. i guess that most of these are ethnically caucasian / aryan who merely had an ancestor(s) who converted to judaism at some point.

most jews don't even seem to practice judaism anymore, so i don't see much point behind lists like this.
       
3
2.
ima.badlady 7 year s ago
Barbra Streisand? Really?... Really?
       
-2
3.
jan_kowalski 7 year s ago
#1 #3 #4 hottest? nigga pls
       
0
4.
User201 7 year s ago
I know about 5-6 of them only , Thank God ! :-)
       
3
5.
Mr. Ree 7 year s ago
Are you fucking kidding me? Streisand??? Pictures of that bitch are used in sex addict clinics to get guys to stop having sex. Not only that, most of these bitches are about as jewish as a slice of bacon. Just because a woman marries a guy that's circumcised does NOT make them jewish.

.
       
-9
6.
Johny 7 year s ago
Gas the Jews!!!
       
4
7.
djp 7 year s ago
Fuck you and your sense of humour.
       
-7
8.
Johny 7 year s ago
Prepare your anus, dip shit! I'm going in dry!!
       
-1
9.
david.duenias.3 7 year s ago
Write your comment here...first we gas you and your family, you ass-hall homo!

Write your comment here...
       
-2
10.
Johny 7 year s ago
"fuk u fag 1v1 me irl ill fukin reck u fagget" - internet
       
0
11.
david.duenias.3 7 year s ago
and jews say they are an ugly race!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
       
-3
12.
AMemoriam 7 year s ago
And they couldn't be more right.
       
2
13.
gigantes 7 year s ago
get a clue. jews are far more a religion than a race across the world.

saying that members of a religion are ugly is inane.
       
0
14.
Fenrisulven 7 year s ago
I want a list of the hottest atheists!
Never underestimate the power of large crowds, of stupid people.
       
-2
15.
dang8521 7 year s ago
Just in case you didn't realize, after all this time, you, mr. ree are my bitch. I own you.
By the way, other men than Jews are circumsised. You, of all people should know that, mr. ree. After all, you do seem to get around.
       
2
16.
gigantes 7 year s ago
dang8521, what would your posting style be like if you didn't roll in obsession for men (calvin klein) every morning?

would an interesting person emerge?
       
-1
17.
Johny 7 year s ago
Yep, your mom.
       
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