Underboob sweat. Literally the bane of your entire existence.
Trickling-down-your-cleavage sweat: clocking in at a close second.
And cleavage sweat stains. Sooooo attractive.
The fact that boob deodorant exists and that, now that you know that, you’re tempted to try it out.
Moving on. You know when it’s super hot and all you want is to wear light, thin fabrics? They make bras like that!
Just…not for you.
You get to do that fun thing where you have to buy an XXXXXXXXXXXL bikini top and a medium bottom.
And if not, you face the dreaded leaking underboob.
While we’re at the beach: Lying down is IMPOSSIBLE. Facedown means this happens:
And faceup means you’re at risk of suffocation by your own boobies.
And when everyone else is adorable in crop tops, yours get a bit too cropped.
Bought a pretty, airy button-down that’s perfect for summer? Haha, no such thing.
Because in order for it to be public-appropriate, it is now twice as warm.
Thinking of doing some fun summer water sports? Good luck strapping this on:
These summery Instagrams that everyone else gets to do automatically turn X-rated if you do them.
In fact, everything you ‘gram all summer is bound to scandalize someone or the other.
Oh, well. Take solace in the fact that this joy is more delightful now than ever:
Found an adoooorable summery backless dress? Probably. Found a backless bra that actually works for you?
All the teeny-boobed girls around you are in cool strapless clothes. And you just can’t be.
It’s swimsuit season. So, for you, it’s flash-everyone-at-the-beach-by-mistake season.
You want to wear low-cut clothes to keep cool, but the twin girls see it as an invitation to come out and play.
Also, hi there, stretch marks. Meet the whole damn world.
And good luck, ladies. We’re aaaaall in this together.