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Historical Facts With A Touch Of NSFW (11 pics + 10 gifs)

Posted in NSFW       12 Dec 2019       8313       2

“Alexander the Great had 361 concubines (official prostitutes), 4 more and he would have one for every day of the year.”

 

“In 1694, Edward Russell threw a party for officers, and with 6,000 guests coming, wanted to make it special. So, he made the world’s largest cocktail. He drained the garden fountain and used that as a giant punch bowl with hundreds of gallons of liquor, over a half-ton of sugar, thousands of lemons, etc. He hired bartenders to paddle around in boats, scoop it up, and serve it to attendees. At some point, it began to rain, so they put a tent up over the fountain to prevent it from getting watered down. About a week after they started, they had drunk every last drop, the fountain was dry, and the party was over.”

 

“The “Father of Microbiology,” Antonie Van Leeuwenhoek, was the first to examine semen under a microscope immediately after ejaculating in his wife.”

 

“Catherine The Great had a parlor room filled with explicit, erotic furniture she commissioned personally. We’re talking blow jobs carved into chairs, an end table where giant d@#ks’ torrential cumshots were holding up a marble countertop, a woman getting eaten out by a demon on a throne… homegirl had taste.”

 

“Powdered wigs were invented to cover up head sores caused by syphilis.”

 

“During the age of sail, any time a large ship would come into port, the men often wouldn’t be allowed shore leave for a few days. So you would see small boats packed with prostitutes heading out to the ship at mooring. Larger ships of the line would have over 500 men aboard so there could definitely be a couple hundred ladies brought aboard “behind the captain’s back.” and with virtually no privacy aboard, you would have spaces in the ship with hundreds of couples going at it at once.”

 

“There was a Greek general, Alcibiades, who was supposed to lead a major expedition to Sicily. The night before he left he got wasted and walked around Athens with his other drunk friends and knocked all of the penises off of the statues in Athens. This caused him to be arrested, he missed the expedition and they lost almost all of the men they sent to Sicily because only he knew the plan well enough to pull it off.”

 

“Ben Franklin was a playboy. He was the US Ambassador to France and slept with the daughters of many French nobles. And when he arrived his clothing would influence French fashion.”

 

“Ben Franklin was a super sex freak and loved to tell younger dudes to have sex with older (old) women.”

 

“Roman brothels had pictures of the prostitutes’ specialties above the door to their room.”

 

“At the Battle of Agincourt, most of the English archers fought pantsless because they had serious diarrhea and were literally s@#tting themselves as they fought. They won too.”

 

“D. João VI, former king of Portugal, had a royal masturbator.”

 

“Queen Victoria instituted a system of Certifying prostitute as Syphilis free. They were called the Queen’s ladies of the night. Many Prostitutes hung the certificate above their beds as a point of pride.”

 

“Cleopatra was nicknamed regina meretrix ( the queen of the whores )”

 

“Greeks were heavily into sodomy on both sexes. Women were only required to be virgins vaginally prior to marriage, every other orifice was fair game.”

 

“Early colonizers of the united states used corn cobs as toilet paper.”

 

“Napoleon would ask that his wife, Josephine, not bathe for several days when he knew he would be coming home. My man liked a stinky, stinky lady.”

 

”President Lyndon Johnson was obsessed with his d@#k and loved to show it to people. He called it Jumbo.”

 

“The ancient Egyptians used bees within boxes as vibrators. I also remember hearing a discussion about all the kinky things the ancient Egyptians did with goats. Apparently, goats were a fertility symbol or something back then.”

 

“Don’t know if it’s already been said, but Edgar Allen Poe married his 13-year-old cousin when he was very much older than her.”

 

“The inventor of the bra had a pet whippet named Clitoris.”




2   Comments ?
2
1.
Child 5 month s ago
Bullshit, most of them. Especially the rumors about the famous queens are mostly propaganda to discredit them
       
4
2.
Trained 5 month s ago
Who chose the stupid graphics for this list? A bird pecking pictures at random?
       
27353641acute
belayclappingdance3dashdirol
drinksfoolgirl_craygirl_devilgirl_witch
goodgreenheartJC-LOLJC_doubledown
JC_OMG_signkisslaughingman_in_lmocking
mr47_04musicokroflsarcastic
sm_80tonguevishenka_33vomitwassat
yahooshoot

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